Readers Questions | How to Break Up a Couple


I believe that me and my ex boyfriend broke up because of a spell that his new girlfriend placed on him. He states he still loves me and he thinks they did something as well. What candles can I use to break that spell and bring him back to me?


I am sorry to heat this – not only for you but (and in a lesser amount) sorry for the ‘other woman’ that has to use candle magic or other items to ‘get her man’.

A couple of questions come to mind – why would your boyfriend come in contact with this other woman? Are they co-workers? Is she (or he) desperate? Unsettled? Restless? I cannot tell you how many clients I see in regards to love – because of some tomfoolery going on with one of the couple.

So I would first ask you to think about this – how was the relationship going BEFORE the breakup? ‘She’ might offer something you don’t – or won’t do. This is alright if you have a Code of Standards in which you use to guide your life. It is OK to NOT do something you are being forced to do by threat or pressure, if you do not what to do it. Is he just irresponsible and maybe his leaving is a true ‘blessing’? No offense, but some behaviors are more noticeable when you are standing on the sideline – kind of like when you pull the magnifying glass back, you can see the whole pattern in the leaf – not just one cell.

Another thing to consider is how long has your boyfriend been gone? I had a client once that waited over three months to begin candle work. So, if you want to get your lover back, you will have to work as many days as it has been since they left you. Believe me, the hardest candle spell (and the most costly) are when lovers have been apart for years – due to their hard heads sometimes – before getting back. Remember the longer apart – the harder it is to get them back.

OK after all that, I am going to assume that your relationship was fine and will offer these ideas:

1. You can do a honey jar on him, using ANY personal item that might have DNA on it – toothbrush bristle, razor with hair, hairbrush, old clothes (preferably unwashed), underwear, sweaty tee shirt, Q – tip, snot rag – ANYTHING that you can use to plop in a honey jar to designate HIM. Use two matching lodestones (a ‘male’ lodestone is pointy, rugged and a ‘female’ lodestone is curved, rounded). Use something of your (again – hair, part of your soiled panties, cigarette butt wrapper, lipstick on tissue) and USING ONLY A PART OF THIS ITEM (about a 1 inch square). Write your petition paper and place that on bottom of jar, add personal objects of the both of you, then cover with honey, Karo syrup, brown sugar, white sugar – any sweeteners that you want.  Fill to brim, cap jar, set in bowl and begin lighting free standing pink candles, votive candles or tea lights on top of the lid (see jar here for idea). The idea here is to ‘sweeten’ him up to draw him back and not using any ‘revenge’ type energy in getting him back.


2. You can use a Male and Female Figural Candle and burn them for results. You will need these two candles, a bottle of “Break Up” Condition Oil, a large knife that you bought at the dollar discount store and a plate to hold all of this. Take the Male Candle and make a name paper (a small piece of white paper or brown paper bag with their full name and birth date on it) and either place it under the cleaned candle on the plate (see category “Proper Candle Preparation” in column on right of this page), or you can use a white stick pin and pin it at the heart area of the chest. Clean the Female figural candle and write her name (or as much ‘identifiers’ – meaning description, telephone number or address) that you can – or if all else fails – label it “the other woman he left me for”, and either place it under the candle or pin it TO HER BACK (little backstabber) and set candle on plate. Candles will be standing side by side on plate.

Take bottle of ‘Break Up” oil and pour all of it over the candles, wick, papers and holding the knife blade over plate, pour a little of it over the metal part. Take a couple of deep breaths, focusing on your intent, then voice it outloud, light candles, voice your intention about them breaking up again, and then with force, ‘slice’ the air’ above the candles and bring the knife down between the two candles and let it rest there.

Let candles burn out then gather up all the items and place in paper bag. Take to cemetery gates with 9 pennies and a bottle of red wine (opened) NOTE: Wine does not have to be expensive – only red. Ask the Spirits residing there to hear your plea to break them up and return him to you. Leave all at gate of cemetery entrance. Leave without looking back at offering.


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